its all over

I thought that I have gotten over it but apparently not. i emo-ed for 2 hours during the train ride home and i tot things were better today. but when i looked back at the scores again today, its just sad to be missing out by just one position.

i used to think of the many if only this happened if only that happened. but its no use thinking of all this crap. i guess i will just need some time.